*TRETS MESSAGE GUIDE* *14-07-2022* *TOPIC: THE DANGER OF MATCH-MAKING IN MARRIAGE* *_TEXT: Matt 19:3-12; 1 Cor 10:31; Eph 5:22-33; Psalms 62:5-8; 37:3-11,23,37; 146:5-8_* We are talking about marriage tonight, not just for bachelors and spinsters, but for married brethren and for their children. Marriage issue is very serious. It is not a child’s play that should be handled with levity rather it must be approached with great sense of seriousness and responsibility by would-be couple who are aware of the over whelming implications of getting into a life-long relationship or partnership (Heb 13:14). Therefore, one need to understand what is Match-Making and its dangers. What is Match-Making in Marriage? Match-Making is the process of matching two or more people together for the purpose of Marriage.
There are three means on Match-Making, namely: *_i. Self Match;_* *_ii. Parental Involvement_* *_iii. Friend Introduction._* The Chinese did a survey of 10,000 couples in 1991, it was discovered that majority of the parents/friends match-making greatly ended in total failure. Any Marriage not guided by God’s inspiration and direction is doomed to fail because when God created man, the first thing he instituted was marriage and family. His plan was that every man should be holy in spirit, sound in mind, righteous in the soul and healthy in the body. His plan for every family is that each family should be happy, fruitful and fulfilled, and He has the power to accomplish it. Right from when we are born to our old age, the Lord has promised to be with us. Whatever your dreams, prospects or expectations are in life, the psalmist counsels; “wait thou only upon the Lord and when you trust in the Lord, you can rest assured that the Lord will sustain you and plant your feet on solid ground. Thus teaching on Christian marriage is expected to be accepted and practised like other doctrines or teachings of the Bible. Our marriage must be directed and guided by God’s word so as to achieve the purpose for which God set it up (Matt 19:4,5). Whenever the teaching of God’s word on marriage is neglected or rejected, much trouble result. *1. FOOLISHNESS OF MATCH-MAKING IN CHRISTIAN MARRIGE* *_Psalms 14:1, Eccl 3:1,11; Psalm 32:8,9; Josh 3:4; Isaiah 30:18-21_* Desire or a sense of need in an individual for a life partner with whom to share life in an intimate way begins the marriage journey. God has created every man or woman with this innate feeling and it manifests naturally through maturity, inner urge or a compelling feeling for a life partner when the time comes. But the foolishness of the fool who says or thinks that God has no roles to play in choosing a life partner drives him or her into match making. For a believer, his or her response to this urge of getting a life partner is to approach God in prayer for guidance. As we pray earnestly and sincerely, God communicates in our heart in a way as to lead us to His perfect choice of partner. God can speak through a still small voice in the heart (Prov 20:27; John 10:4,5,27; Acts 10:17-21) or through a strong mind-dominating affection for a particular person. Such affection is God-given and cannot be quenched by contrary circumstances (Song of Solomon 8:6,7). For others, God can speak through dreams or through His word or make a definite impression in the heart in the course of listening to a message or sermon. Whichever channel God chooses to use revelation, dream, vision or impression - God will not contradict His written word. There are pitfalls and dangers in the path to the married life. These include: ☑️ Walking by sight, ☑️ Pre-empting God by dependence on just one way one expects God to lead in knowing His will, ☑️ Having an idol in the heart or ☑️ The carnal practise of allowing others to choose for us. As believers, we must avoid all pitfalls if we are going to remain in the will of God and enjoy a healthy relationship. Every idol should be removed from the heart. Under no circumstance should a true believer marry a non-believer. *2. FOUNDATION OF HAPPY MARRIGE DEVOID OF MATCH-MAKING* *_Rom 8:14; Psalm 11:3; Isaiah 58:11,12; Gen 2:18; Matt 7:7-11; Jer 29:11-13; Ezek 14:2-5; Psalm 106:10-15_* Foundation is very important as we build our home, marriage and family. This is why true believers need to hear from the Spirit of God. Once you start thinking of who to marry, it is time to think of the foundation because when the foundation is out of course, families walk on in darkness. The foundation of a Christian home is built by the Holy Spirit while the foundation of a house is built with sand and cement. If you take a wrong step at the beginning of your marriage, your family unit will suffer in the future. But if you allow the Spirit of the Lord to guide you, many generations after you will benefit from it. When you lay such solid foundation at the beginning of your marriage, both you and many generations to come will benefit from it. Getting married without praying, preparing and planning is like building a house without a foundation. What protection, pleasure or progress do you think you are going to have in such a home? It was the Lord who said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. Does God love others more than He loves you? No. God loves everyone with no exception. As He said it was not good for Adam to be alone, He is saying the same of you. Beyond your thought or plan, the Lord is thinking of and planning about it for you. The Lord thinks of us as precious, important and valuable. This is why He tells us we ought to pray. He has promised to give us our heart desires. *Marriage devoid of Match-Making must:* ✅ Be God’s plan and programme from the beginning (Gen 2:18; Eph 5:31). ✅ Be a divinely ordained necessity (Gen 2:18; ✅ Make for preservation of purity and holiness in the church and society (1 Cor 7:2,9-11; ✅ Work for the completeness and fulfilment of true living (Eccl 4:9-12). ✅ Complements God’s work of procreation (Psalms 128:3). With very few exceptions, most people should marry. The few exceptions should be guided by God (1 Cor 7:7,8,32,34) and must not be the product of selfish immature decisions, misguided imitations, faithless conclusion or religious compulsion. *3. FULFILMENT AND FRUITHFULNESS OF MARRIGE DEVOID OF MATCH-MAKING* *_Exo 23:25-27,22; Deut 28:1,2,7-13_* The word of God assures us of God’s blessings upon our families. A Marriage devoid of Match-Making will experience the following God’s radiant blessings: ➡️ Love will radiate around the home (John 17:23) ➡️ Peace of God which passes all understanding will be experienced (Phil.4:7) ➡️ God’s abiding presence all the time (Exod 33:14) ➡️ Answer to every prayer (Matt 18:18) ➡️ Blessings from God and men (Gen 12:1-3; Psalms 128:3) ➡️ Victory over all contending forces against the home (Isaiah 49:24,25;Ex 14:14) ➡️ Unity and understanding (Psalms133:1-5) ➡️ Progress and prosperity (Psalms1:1-3) ➡️ Good example for others to see and glorify the name of the Lord concerning them (Matt 5:13).
Comments